What a Difference

Just a day later, and my life seems so much better.

I got to bed ridiculously early last night, just before 10, woke up in a pretty decent mood, then rolled over for another 40 minutes, got up, checked my email and discovered my friend was willing to put our argument behind us, which is nice, and had myself a nice breakfast complete with honey garlic sausages I picked up yesterday on the Drive.

I took the time to enjoy my breakfast, hopped on the scoot, and traffic was bliss for once. Nothing irked me, no unforeseen obstacles, all good.

Work has been like night and day compared to my last two weeks. I've gotten so much shit done and, for the first time in weeks, I feel like a competent human being. Unbelievable. Oh, my god. I'm feeling almost like myself today. About damned time.

Add to that getting a really nice email from someone this afternoon, and my day's going in good places.

What a difference a good, restful sleep makes, you know? I'd had that fun experience writing last night and for some reason it just allowed some of my stress to ebb away. I'm sure all the stretching I'd done during Rockstar helped, too.

I'm wondering if this new switch to trying to suppress my period was maybe fucking with my equilibrium -- maybe an extended PMS or something? Now that I've finally gotten my "womanly curse," and the PMS has died off, I'm almost feeling like the old Steff for the first time in weeks. I'm one for finding coincidences and thinking they mean a lot, so maybe I'm overthinking it (not a surprise) but it seems to compute. It's probably the pills fucking with me again. Hmm.

Either way, I feel oddly free today. I even put off my lunch break until about 20 minutes ago. I hope there's more of this Me available in the near future. I've missed this feeling. I've missed being myself. And, what's more, I've been pretty angry about it. Today, no anger.

Thank god. And, add to all that goodness this wonderful toasted cranberry-turkey panini, and life's a good thang, baby. Today, anyhow.