Apple, You're a Cunt

Snicker.

Yeah, love that. Spend the big $699 on a phone and then a mere 10 weeks later, Apple slashes the price by $200 to bolster "holiday sales" on fucking LABOUR DAY? It's September! Holidays? FUCK OFF. I haven't even dealt with the fact that I'm 34 in 24 days, or that Thanksgiving is in five weeks, and now you wanna tell me to think about HOLIDAY SALES?

Christ! Like life's not moving fast enough without this speed-merchandising madness?

Oh, and I'm officially SO not buying anything when Apple's launching it. My 3-month "let the hype go far far away" rule just got written in stone. Fuckin' trendies. So materialistic. Snicker. Everyone point and laugh now.

And, geez, doesn't Steve Jobs look like a right twat in that photo? That photo's evidence of how photo editors get to editorialize their pieces. Like, for instance, Apple slashes prices by about 30% after 10 weeks on the market and the invisible thought-caption hanging over Steve Jobs' head with that expression probably reads "Well, yes, I might be an asshole, but I have stock options. And you paid the $200. Phone someone who cares."