Holy obvious, Batman

What the hell? This is NEWS?

I'm watching the news and the "ticker" at the bottom ticks by with "New Orleans residents hope Rita passes them by." There's three precious seconds of my life I'll never have back.

No shit, Sherlock. A city decimated by a class four hurricane are "hoping" the oncoming class five hurricane passes them by. The only news there is the blatant understatement in the word "hoping." Try PRAYING, motherfuckers.

Then, get this: "Long lines of cars are heading out of coastal Texan towns as Hurricane Rita gains strength to become a Category 5 storm with maximum sustained winds of 165 mph (267 km/h). Texas Gov. Rick Perry says: "Now is the time to leave.""

The troubling part of speech is you can never have fine print. You can't add, in microscopic lettering, "Or, if you're poor, black, or too ill to be transported, now is the time to pray like there's no fucking tomorrow, you poor son of a bitch."

Of course, it IS an "act of God" to begin with, so, the praying thing's kind of pointless, too. It's probably a good time for boardgames, instead, like a game of Twister.

Pun not fully intended.